Puff Puff? Pass?
You know them mornings when you have had interrupted sleep?
You wake around 3 fortysomething am. You have to be up at 7.30 am...You don't fall back asleep until after 6.13 am because that is the last time you saw before falling back to sleep.
And. Then. It. Begins.
The coughing.
The pungent smell of skunk filling my home.
It's 6 fiftysomething.
Get up.
Close the window.
*Go back to come forward*
I've nothing against weed, I'm not an advocate either.
Skunk I'm not a fan of...I call it bad spirit.
It messes with a lot of minds if you don't know about your THC's and your CBD's, CBN's, THCV's and CBC's.
I experienced negative effects of Skunk in my 20's.
Trying to self medicate...ending up with (self diagnosed - okay I borrowed it from a doctor, I'll explain in a bit), a mild form of acute transient weed psychosis with extreme paranoia.
It was around the time 911 happened, my block was being renovated and I was convinced that since the world was such a horrible place, people were going to climb up the scaffolding and kill me. I slept with a knife under my pillow, Ronnie (a solid mdf table leg), on the left of the bed, just under, out of intruders sight and Reggie (my Nan's Tomahawk she used for pruning plants and as a makeshift hammer - we country innit), under the bed on the right side.
The nightmares' the tears, waking up and not being able to move, (it's called 'sleep paralysis' but I KNOW IT as 'Duppie a ride yuh' because when I fought and cursed out it blousenart...VOILA, I felt it get up and MOVE!!!), a deep sadness that led me to try Shaharja Yoga Meditation (another post, another post).
That and other things led me to stop smoking skunk because underlying was a knowledge that it wasn't the whole of the cause of what was happening but it did play a huge part in it. I switched to regular 'Rasta Man Weed', the cake mix smelling, seeds and twigs having, earthy type weed. To be fair, you don't see many Rasta Man/Woman wigging out who only smoke regular weed.
*fast forward*
Noticing that there are a lot of young people experiencing psychosis from the copious amounts of skully they bun (burn). Remember the brain doesn't fully form until the age of 21 so messing with its chemistry isn't the best idea...remember mi tell you is bad spirit.
*fast forward some more*
There is the introduction of synthetic weed to the market, even more brain chemistry confusion.
*fast forward again*
December last year, someone close - a dear heart, (who will remain anonymous unless they choose to tell their story), under the age of 20 was sectioned after having a spliff laced with synthetic weed...(yep xmas was a bit peakly peared as I had left my job 5 days before I got the news and my friend had died suddenly 3 days before).
Once it was out of their system, they recovered completely, I gave them my theory about the Rasta Man weed and said if they are gonna continue to smoke, maybe that is the way to go.
*forward some more*
Getting to the point of the post...What? That up there? That's context for you reading - 8 million stories and all that...
I have been increasingly irritated with a neighbour that wakes and bakes with skunk every morning. Not only does it stink, said neighbour has an alarming cough, plus it gives me a contact high that I have to fight through EVERY FARKIN MORNING - I run a small business, I got shit to do. The contact high makes me paranoid and very very angry, like chock full of rage because A) it's a skunk high - that's how it reacts with my brain chemistry and B) it constantly pulls me back to that time, being afraid, sleeping with a knife under my pillow. I am literally traumatised every morning.
*back to the future*
??? 'I thought that if I shank him in the lung, he wont be able to smoke your honour' nope, premeditated.
'I didn't know what else to do so I threw the hammer out of the window, I didn't mean to kill him, I just wanted to make him stop, I just didn't wanna go through this every morning'
*back to the present*
NAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I'm awake 30/40 minutes before I needed to be, after broken sleep, about to go through the calming process for the umpteenth time, it's not working, I was laying down but now I'm moving towards the back door without and recollection of actually getting up. 'Natalie, are you gonna jump out the fuckin window on him?' *even in the midst of #REDRAGE I have a sense of humour that is an inappropriate lifesaver*
As my hand yanks the door open, I stick my head out and say 'have you ever tried fuckin eating it bab? Your lungs cant take much more. Flapjacks or brownies or sutn, I know you like to wake and bake, I wake and bake every fuckin morning wid you' he asked 'how much weed do you put in' I replied 'not sure bout the amounts but a 10 bag cooked will get you lean, look on google for recipes. That cough is dread for someone so young, you're only a baby, eating it might be the way to go' he said 'I know, its really bad, yeah my dad eats it, gonna ask my dad'...
and just like that, the tension was broken, a temporary solution to an impossible situation, on broken sleep, at the end of my tether...
I've gotta get ready as I am attending a funeral today, I want to be there, present, you get me?
I had to get it out or I would go crazy. When I share 'good morning' or 'have a good day' or one of my soaps or something I care about, just overstand the daily rituals to get there. What seem small to some is an achievement to others...it is hard work being a decent somebody and the work gets done, every day, no breaks whether I choose to or not.
Be nice, Be kind, Talk to me sweet and that is what you will get back, love, Daisy's Granddaughter xx
You wake around 3 fortysomething am. You have to be up at 7.30 am...You don't fall back asleep until after 6.13 am because that is the last time you saw before falling back to sleep.
And. Then. It. Begins.
The coughing.
The pungent smell of skunk filling my home.
It's 6 fiftysomething.
Get up.
Close the window.
*Go back to come forward*
I've nothing against weed, I'm not an advocate either.
Skunk I'm not a fan of...I call it bad spirit.
It messes with a lot of minds if you don't know about your THC's and your CBD's, CBN's, THCV's and CBC's.
I experienced negative effects of Skunk in my 20's.
Trying to self medicate...ending up with (self diagnosed - okay I borrowed it from a doctor, I'll explain in a bit), a mild form of acute transient weed psychosis with extreme paranoia.
It was around the time 911 happened, my block was being renovated and I was convinced that since the world was such a horrible place, people were going to climb up the scaffolding and kill me. I slept with a knife under my pillow, Ronnie (a solid mdf table leg), on the left of the bed, just under, out of intruders sight and Reggie (my Nan's Tomahawk she used for pruning plants and as a makeshift hammer - we country innit), under the bed on the right side.
The nightmares' the tears, waking up and not being able to move, (it's called 'sleep paralysis' but I KNOW IT as 'Duppie a ride yuh' because when I fought and cursed out it blousenart...VOILA, I felt it get up and MOVE!!!), a deep sadness that led me to try Shaharja Yoga Meditation (another post, another post).
That and other things led me to stop smoking skunk because underlying was a knowledge that it wasn't the whole of the cause of what was happening but it did play a huge part in it. I switched to regular 'Rasta Man Weed', the cake mix smelling, seeds and twigs having, earthy type weed. To be fair, you don't see many Rasta Man/Woman wigging out who only smoke regular weed.
*fast forward*
Noticing that there are a lot of young people experiencing psychosis from the copious amounts of skully they bun (burn). Remember the brain doesn't fully form until the age of 21 so messing with its chemistry isn't the best idea...remember mi tell you is bad spirit.
*fast forward some more*
There is the introduction of synthetic weed to the market, even more brain chemistry confusion.
*fast forward again*
December last year, someone close - a dear heart, (who will remain anonymous unless they choose to tell their story), under the age of 20 was sectioned after having a spliff laced with synthetic weed...(yep xmas was a bit peakly peared as I had left my job 5 days before I got the news and my friend had died suddenly 3 days before).
Once it was out of their system, they recovered completely, I gave them my theory about the Rasta Man weed and said if they are gonna continue to smoke, maybe that is the way to go.
*forward some more*
Getting to the point of the post...What? That up there? That's context for you reading - 8 million stories and all that...
I have been increasingly irritated with a neighbour that wakes and bakes with skunk every morning. Not only does it stink, said neighbour has an alarming cough, plus it gives me a contact high that I have to fight through EVERY FARKIN MORNING - I run a small business, I got shit to do. The contact high makes me paranoid and very very angry, like chock full of rage because A) it's a skunk high - that's how it reacts with my brain chemistry and B) it constantly pulls me back to that time, being afraid, sleeping with a knife under my pillow. I am literally traumatised every morning.
*back to the future*
??? 'I thought that if I shank him in the lung, he wont be able to smoke your honour' nope, premeditated.
'I didn't know what else to do so I threw the hammer out of the window, I didn't mean to kill him, I just wanted to make him stop, I just didn't wanna go through this every morning'
*back to the present*
NAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I'm awake 30/40 minutes before I needed to be, after broken sleep, about to go through the calming process for the umpteenth time, it's not working, I was laying down but now I'm moving towards the back door without and recollection of actually getting up. 'Natalie, are you gonna jump out the fuckin window on him?' *even in the midst of #REDRAGE I have a sense of humour that is an inappropriate lifesaver*
As my hand yanks the door open, I stick my head out and say 'have you ever tried fuckin eating it bab? Your lungs cant take much more. Flapjacks or brownies or sutn, I know you like to wake and bake, I wake and bake every fuckin morning wid you' he asked 'how much weed do you put in' I replied 'not sure bout the amounts but a 10 bag cooked will get you lean, look on google for recipes. That cough is dread for someone so young, you're only a baby, eating it might be the way to go' he said 'I know, its really bad, yeah my dad eats it, gonna ask my dad'...
and just like that, the tension was broken, a temporary solution to an impossible situation, on broken sleep, at the end of my tether...
I've gotta get ready as I am attending a funeral today, I want to be there, present, you get me?
I had to get it out or I would go crazy. When I share 'good morning' or 'have a good day' or one of my soaps or something I care about, just overstand the daily rituals to get there. What seem small to some is an achievement to others...it is hard work being a decent somebody and the work gets done, every day, no breaks whether I choose to or not.
Be nice, Be kind, Talk to me sweet and that is what you will get back, love, Daisy's Granddaughter xx
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